A = Avoid Negativity. (Negative People, News, Gossip, Death, Bad News, etc.)

The easiest way to avoid negativity is to simply surround yourself with positive people, take control of your schedule – instead of watching Drama Shows, News or Netflix, create a daily schedule that you love – join groups and meet-ups once a week – join business meetings, political activities, church. There are so many free (Meetup.com) and paid groups that are VERY positive, learn to speak another language, join Toastmasters to become a good speakers once a week. Every morning you have two options: A. Evolve or B. Repeat. Try to create a day surrounded by positivity. 

T = Ten solutions.

Can’t figure out how to surround yourself with positivity? I believe there are 10 solutions to every problem. Start by writing down the problem and then start writing some ideas to solve it. Soon you will become a super-problem-solver, it’s like a muscle – flex it often.  Create multiple options and go with the best one.  No boss or customer wants to be handed problems. Focus on the solution – not the problem. Never pass a problem up-hill without articulating a solution first. If urgent – think of at least one solution quickly. 

T = Talk after. 

Listen first – don’t cut people off when or if they get emotional. Stay calm. Listen first. When you attend meetings, wait to be the last person on that topic and listen to everyone first. It’s difficult to “hush-up-and-listen” but become a great listener. I believe people are desperate for others to really listen to them – and they may just give you an additional solution if you let them finish a sentence. In sales, if you can’t solve it for the customer, let them talk until they tell you how to solve it themselves. To become a great talker, become a great listener. 

I = Identify goals.

Identify your goal first! Often times, we communicate our rightness without asking ourselves a very important question … “What am I trying to accomplish with this communication?”. Become a master at persuasion by asking the right question. People are rarely every swayed by declaring them wrong and yourself right, people are easily swayed with manners and a genuine question. We often see offensive meme’s that get our blood boiling and blurt out some angry response. Ask yourself, what is this person trying to accomplish? Or what do I want to accomplish with this? When you identify the goal first it becomes way more powerful and you clarify your focus like a hot knife through butter. Also try phrasing your statement as a question to make the other side see your point. 

T = Take responsibility.

You could also say, the buck stops here – or “If It’s to be – it is up to me”. You can only change that which you are responsible for – people are trained to assume the victim mentality – everything was done to me – it’s impossible to change something you are not responsible for. If you get struck by lightening – ask yourself “man, I must be powerful, I wonder what I did to cause that”. Avoid the victim role like the plague. 

U = Understanding heals.

Understanding is magical. In every interaction, you can understand the other person, without declaring them right or wrong. Every argument has two sides, every person is like an ocean, seemingly calm or flat on the surface but, there are millions of plants,  experiences (fish) and tides (influences) pushes and pulls underneath. You only see the surface, try and get underneath and always try to understand where the person is coming from. Does not mean they are right – but at least hear them out and understand what they say. Nobody is perfect (except my daughter) … have you ever had a cavity? Well, I guess you are imperfect too. 

D = Deliver more.

Try and create customers for life instead of “one-and-done”. Try to give others more than you ask for. If you want to be rich ask yourself, how can I make other people rich? Always try and give more than is asked for. If you own a restaurant, give them a little treat to take home, free of charge, if you are a server, give them an extra drink on the house or a free desert – you are in the business of creating relationships – and the difference between an contact and a contract is the letter “R” (for relationships). 

Example: Starbucks has had delivery and food problems in Austin, and over the past several months they have often been out of sandwiches – but one of my favorite “Barista’s” took responsibility and when the sandwiches finally came in – without asking – he gave me a double-stacked sandwich. I was so impressed I thought “Man I’d like to hire that person some day”. It wasn’t his fault the sandwiches were out of stock – but he took responsibility and gave extra service above and beyond his duty. And he would have gotten an awesome raise. 

E = End well.

If you ever get in an argument, use it as a reason to talk further, if someone complains about you at work to the boss, try and hear that person out at least. You never know what other people have going on in their life or what is motivating them. Just like Understanding – your goal is to leave every transaction in a positive happy manner. Even if you have to bite your tongue sometimes to avoid getting angry. If you can not work with the person then simply avoid discussing any negativity and only respond to the good parts, “good roads and good weather” can work on anyone – no matter how angry, try not to be fake – just wish them well on their way. In every transaction, make sure the customer leaves happy. In every relationship – make sure it ENDS WELL. Sometimes you’ll have to eat your pride – but it will be worth it in the end.